I’ll start by saying that I think there are positives to the #metoo movement. I know that some people on the left will glaze over the praise and say I have no business talking about this issue, and I know some people on the right will criticize me for acknowledging a positive side to the movement at all. That’s what happens when you find yourself in the middle of political conversations, straddling that center line, being seen as having no opinions of value because you do not adhere to the rules or scripts of either side.
I am a believer in nuance and in the experience of the individual. I don’t much care for groups or movements. You won’t see me picketing the 1% or for an increased minimum wage or women’s rights or men’s rights. It’s not because I don’t care about these things, I’d just sooner keep to myself. That being said, I’m not opposed to anyone marching in the streets with signs or praising Jesus every Sunday at church. I celebrate your right to do so. I am grateful that, to this day, I have not been oppressed or marginalized in a severe way. Perhaps my hand just hasn’t been forced as I am a white male (gasp), and for that I am neither proud nor ashamed. That’s just the way it is—I can’t change it. Well I suppose I could.
I said there were positives to the #metoo movement. I want to live in a world where rapists are convicted 100% of the time. More than that, I’d like to live in a world with no rape or sexual assault. Unfortunately there is real evil in the world and this common-sensed approach is seen as some unachievable utopia. We can’t control the weather, but we can control our shelter from the weather. In other words, bad people exist, but we can build our case to bring them to justice. It makes me happy to see so many courageous women come forward and testify against scumbags like Bill Cosby or Harvey Weinstein. I realize these are high profile cases, but the same goes for the scum without celebrity status. These women are brave and should be treated with dignity and respect. Unfortunately for these women who tell the truth, there are leeches that suck the blood out of their movement by lying for attention and sympathy.
I think the phrase “believe all women” is dangerous. It’s like using a Class A water extinguisher on every type of fire. It will work great for wood but it will be disastrous for electrical fires. The same goes with the blanket statement, “believe all women.” It works great for the ones telling the truth, but it doesn’t work so well for the ones who are lying. I recently saw a video that made me realize these are nuanced, case-by-case incidents that should be treated as such and not simply lumped into one movement. In the video, a middle-aged white woman was at the counter of a convenience store as a mother and her children, who were black, walked by. One of the kids accidentally brushed the woman as he walked by. The woman then phoned the police, claiming that she had been sexually assaulted by the child. It was disgusting to watch as the child, who had done nothing wrong, cried while this woman accused him of sexual assault while on the phone with the police. I wish I could say this was the first time I’d seen something like this; unfortunately it wasn’t.
With any movement that picks up steam, things can sometimes go off the rails. These leeches should not take away from real accusations, but unfortunately they do distract from the heart of the movement. This is a conversation that doesn’t begin or end here. There is much more to say and do. I recognize that my opinion is formed based on my own experiences and that some people have gone through things that would alter their perception from mine. These different voices are positive. Show tolerance to those with whom you disagree and speak with love. Perhaps we can all learn a thing or two from one another.
Peace of the Shore 